your room smells of hookers.
And success
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
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I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
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I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize