What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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