well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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