I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
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