i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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