I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
There are leaves in my underwear?
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize