My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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