remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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