Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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