What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
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normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
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I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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