I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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