just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
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there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
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I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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