just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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