im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize