The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
worst night to have a conscience
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Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
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The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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