You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize