I want to stick my p in your. b.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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