I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize