it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize