You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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