According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
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its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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