I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
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Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
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So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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