I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
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We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
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I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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