I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize