GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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