i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he thought i was a dude.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
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Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
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Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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