He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
...so i touched it.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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