The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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