Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
No subtext here. People are naked.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize