Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize