she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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