some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Randomize