woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
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