I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
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I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
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I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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