Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize