i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
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my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize