God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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