im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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