Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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