The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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