I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
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She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
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I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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