I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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