DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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