ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Moan for me like Helen Keller
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
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Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
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Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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