Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize