Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize