Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize