Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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