I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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