sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whose parrot is this?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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