We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
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Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
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My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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